A great leap

Last week, Man was having a really rotten week. He had CQ (a 24 hour shift on post which requires a day of recovery so he can actually sleep, so you can essentially miss an entire weekend or two days of class from it), test prep was not going well, he was exhausted, and his grandmother died. All of that put together pretty much had him wiped out. We were soon to be faced with this past dr's appt to evaluate how well the shot went, and discussing that had him stressed out.

He asked me one night what I thought he should do... push for medical help, or ask for a stress break, keep going, try to get out of the Army... and thoughts were just clogging him up.

I told him that it came down to one very simple decision: either push through this and stay in, or give up. Once that decision has been made, everything else will just be easier to decide.

He thought about that and wasn't comfortable with that idea at all. I don't blame him.

Last night we had a Family Readiness Group (FRG) which means that a bunch of soldiers as well as the non-commissioned officers and officers in charge of the company get together for a potluck and a brief informational presentation. I've been putting together a monthly calendar for them, as well as teaching at the community center which has given me that chance to get to know a lot of the people running things around here. Our FRG leader (S) is leaving soon and they're looking for a new one -- which means I'm being hit up for the job since I'm the only spouse in the company who has shown interest in involvement. I was chatting with S to try to find out what exactly the job would entail when the Captain joined his wife who happened to be at our table and was listening in. I told S that if Man gets medical boarded and therefore no longer has the extra work from hia current job that I could go ahead and take the job no problem, because then I'd have the support at home in the evenings I'd need to handle it all. But with all of that uncertain...

(real quick rank comparison: the Captain is like a bishop, who takes care of about 250 soldiers. 1st Sergeant is like his first councilor.)

Then Captain chimed in with a few thoughts on that, we chatted about Man's shoulder, and here are some of the points that came up that had me totally surprised:

1. He knew when Man's next fit for duty appt was. He takes care of that many people, and knew that appt time. Blew me away.

2. He has a rather poor opinion of the dr who treated Man, so apparently this guy has a history of just blowing soldiers off.

3. He said that since (#2, above) is the case, he would absolutely send Man to either of a couple of posts not too far from here where he would actually get the medical help he needs to get his shoulder back up to par.

I chatted with another sergeant who is in Man's chain of command who also happens to work with him in such a job capacity that he has close daily contact with him. After Man left for a moment Sgt turned to me and said that he was trying his best to keep Man's spirits up, and to let him know that they were all pulling for him. His words: "I take care of my soldiers." And that's all there was to it. That almost made me cry.

The piece de resistance: 1st Sergeant took Man aside and laid it on the table -- he wanted Man to decide whether he wanted to stay in the Army or not, and if he was going to stay in that they would see about getting whatever treatment he needed off post or even sending him across the country if they needed to.

That had me totally stunned.

Choose??? CHOOSE???

So last night Man and I had a very frank discussion about how we felt about the whole situation. We acknowledged the possibility and even probability that a) if he stays in he'd likely get deployed and b) even if he stays in, it isn't a guarantee that his shoulder will be healed.

After all was said and done, he decided to stick with it. There have been so many chances in the past where we could have sacrificed and stuck with something, like a job or school. There's always a way to get done what you have to, to make something work.

And now he's decided to go the distance.

I'm so very proud of this Man. This is the hardest job he's ever had, and even with a clear choice available to cut and run, he decided to stick with it.

His line of the evening: I've never really been able to commit to my own personal success.

After that entire evening, after the outpouring of support from the entire cadre, after these people who knew his situation so intimately who I never imagined would even know his name, I was so overwhelmed that I couldn't sleep or eat. I am so grateful and hopeful not only for what they've shown us can happen to support him, but also for this chance that Man has had to face his one great demon and decide to work to dispel it.

A huge mantle of weight has fallen from both of us. We're exhausted but once again Man has renewed direction and determination.

We wholeheartedly acknowledge that this one pivotal moment won't make things easy. In fact, it may get harder, especially with a baby on the way and the possibility of shoulder surgery. But the fact that the decision has been made is absolutely liberating.

Advent (again)

I tend to take one craft project, beat it to death with ideas, then get overwhelmed by the dreams I have for it. Then I give up and say it wouldn't have looked very good anyway.

So, to get over these sour grapes I've decided to K-I-S-S (Keep It Simple, Stupid) my crafty troubles and turn those sour grapes into wine... which I don't drink, but you get the idea.

Anyway, so the current idea for advent is to make a fabric banner to which I will append 25 little bags or things for the advent days. So far I've got 2.5" wide ribbon cut into appropriate lengths to make little bags (simple and very easy) and I'm thinking of sewing ribbons to the cloth to keep the bags tied up. But I need to get three more kinds of ribbon so I can have 2 each of every design.

I've been looking around for other ideas just to vary it up a bit, like crocheting a few since a homespun yarn bag would work up in no time.

Then I thought of mini Chinese take out boxes which can be found at Michael's, that can be decorated with stamps or paints, and the little handles could be tied on with matching ribbon.

Then I thought of using scrapbook paper to make puffy envelopes, but I might have to make pockets on the fabric banner for those.

Then I thought, if I put buttons on it then I could either attach ribbon for the bags or a custom pocket for the puffy envelopes.

Then I thought that I could just make a mini envelop for each little bag anyway with a scripture, and then I'd need a button and a ribbon for each one anyway.

Then I wondered if small match boxes would just take care of the whole shebang but then I'd still have to cover them with paper or mod podge some tissue paper on in several layers, maybe gluing on some ribbons and buttons and line them if I was planning on putting unwrapped candy in them.

I've thought about doing fabric stockings, but the thought of cutting all of them (25 x 3 kids x 2 sides per stocking = 150 stockings to cut out) made me ill but then Mom rescued that idea by saying I could just go to a trift shop and find a bunch of decent looking socks.

Then I wondered if they have the Christmas version of Easter Eggs that I could just hang on the tree, then I remembered that we won't be having a large tree since we have a toddler this year and for the next two years as well.

Then I remembered that my mom is making an advent thingy for me anyway, so why am I worried about it?

Then I remembered that I'm pregnant and my nesting instinct wants to make, clean, and put right my whole house NOW and perfectly.

I started a crochet stocking for Princess last night. I looked at my starting loop and wondered aloud if it was large enough. Princess looked at it with a critical eye for a second then asked "well, is it large enough for an orange to go in the toe?" Bless that child! She knows our traditions.

Shoulder update

Man had a two week follow up since the cortisone shot, and his shoulder has gotten worse. The dr told him that there was nothing he could do and that Man would very likely be medical boarded, which means discharged for medical reasons.

::sigh::

What an interesting life here.

A Clear Sign

You know it's time to upgrade a size in diapers when....

Or quite beverages past 6 pm when...

Or she's been using a birdbath as a lounging chair when...

Or she's been splashing in puddles when...

... you find in the morning that she's soaked all of her clothes almost to her armpits. The soakage went clear through her blanket sleeper.

Princess

It's been a while since I've posted a pic of Princess. We usually get the camera out before she gets home from school, poor girl.

Product review: silicone muffin papers

I really like muffins a lot. They give me a great way to use up leftover fruits (or zucchini), they make a quick and portable breakfast for Man, and a perfect snack for Princess' school snack. I've been on a huge muffin kick lately cranking out zucchini muffins, banana muffins, and tried for the first time "put the lime in the coconut muffins" which were surprisingly delicious even though I used regular lime juice rather than key lime. I really didn't like muffins papers because I hated keeping them on hand and how they seem to take half the muffin with them, but I also really didn't like having to scrub out nonstick muffin pans if I left them bare, so I thought that silicone muffin cups would be the ideal solution. They are free standing so I could get rid of my muffin pans and just put them on cookie sheets, they can go from the freezer to the oven without sustaining damage, it'd be easy to stack them with water inside each cup so they could soak for easy cleaning, and I wouldn't have to use cooking spray which would make my muffins marginally healthier.

Nice idea. It turns out that while they are free standing, I never did use them for freezing, they were extremely difficult to clean, and I had to use cooking spray in them anyway or half the muffin would be get left behind when it came time to demold them. Oh, well.

My other options include stone ware muffin pans or just making 8x8" cakes and cutting. I like the versatility of muffins and the textures you can get from specialty muffins like those coconut ones or peach cobbler muffins. There is also the benefit of getting more upper crust into the bargain which is especially great if you're doing something like a streusel muffin.

It's also easier to portion out the goods if the kids aren't cutting their own pieces from a cake. Although, this morning I found that Pebbles had discovered the cooling rack with the coconut muffins and wasted no time in grabbing one per hand and taking a bite out of each, heedless of the muffin papers I've started using again. Oh, well. [insert fiber joke here] Haha!!

Chucky E. Cheese-loise

Due to a series of events, Man managed to not have to work today after all and it rained so the block party scheduled to take place in our backyard got canceled (the park, not really our backyard) so we went ahead and took the kids to Princess' friend's birthday party at Chuck E. Cheese's. This is my first time setting foot in one as an adult.

We got there around 2:30 and the first thing we noticed was the line that went out the door. We managed to sneak in since we were already with a party and the din was unbelievable. Games, ski ball, kids running around, trash every where, lots of parents sitting around looking bored waiting for their kids to run through their stacks of tokens. The party itself was kinda cute. The Big Cheese himself came to sing the birthday song for the guest of honor, everyone got their pic taken with him, and the kids really did have a blast.

Tag went out of his mind running around, literally jumping around the whole place, running from game to game and trying to play everything that involved balls, smashing things, or riding a kiddy ride. Pebbles liked the lights and was cautiously pleased with one of those kiddy rocking car ride things you can sometimes find outside of grocery stores. I don't think we put her on the floor the whole time we were there just because we were afraid of losing her in the pulsing crowd. Princess had a really great time spending a couple of hours with her friends from school. It was nice to see her smiling and chatting with the girls.

By the time we left my ears were numb and Man and I were both a bit grumpy and tired but all three kids were pleasantly worn down and smiling. I've mentioned this place to a few parents and not one of them has said that they like it. Princess wants her birthday to be there.

The nice thing at the end of the day: all three of them crashed into their beds without a peep, we were "cool" parents for taking them there, Princess got extra-curricular social time, and we managed a family outing including singing songs during the car ride.

Now I'm going to go crash.

Remotes and Interprative Dance

I got out our little advent ornaments that I made last year for the two older kids to count them up and see what needed to be made this year. All three of the kids loves looking through them and got them excited for Christmas (I know, I know!! Halloween has barely hit my radar, too)

P: How far away is Christmas.
A: September, October, November, December. Three months and a few days.
P: Three days?? [hopeful, excited]
A: No, three MONTHS. That's still a long time.
T: Wait a minute! Christmas was yesterday mom! Where's my stocking?
A: Nice try, kid.
T: Oh [laughing] that's right, it's tomorrow isn't it?
A: Um, no. Nice try again.

Later, while tending to tomato plants:

P: I'm sad that we won't have any snow for Christmas this year.
T: It's ok, I'll buy a remote and push the button and make it snow so it can be Christmas tomorrow!
P: [leaning over to me and whispering] Is that true?

For the rest of the night he talked about his snow remote.

The baby in Tag's stomach

I was cleaning up today and had Tag take a pile of his socks into his bedroom. After gathering them into the makeshift bag of his shirt, I joked that it looked like he had a baby in his stomach.

He seemed enchanted with the idea, then went to share it with Princess.

P: Can I see your baby?
T: Well, it's coming out at 6:30 on Wednesday.
P: How do you feel?
T: Oh, wait, look, it's coming out!! [he starts to slowly open his shirt bag] It hurts very badly! [his voice is a low groan] Oh, my hips hurt! Watch! Wait, sorry, the baby's not coming. Wait, it hurts again!

At that point I just had to walk away before busting out a real, feel-good belly laugh.

more pics

And again out come the paper bags:

Movie

Bored Tag, and his face. He's so much like his dad, constantly using weird voices and accents and consciously animating his face in the most hilarious ways. He's assembling quite the repertoire of funny voices and they're always a surprise, like he's been honing them in his head only to spring them on his unsuspecting family.

Camera

Every pic I've taken lately has been sort of glowy, like everything has got a halo. I couldn't figure it out, so while I was giving the camera the evil eye...

I finally found a ton of little finger prints on the lens.

Before I figured it out though I got Tag to do some posing for me. He's bored today again. All of his usual friends are somehow indisposed so we had a fun time posing and snapping shots. I told him to do a silly mouth and angry eyes at the same time.

Followed by Pebbles. Gosh, I really need to put that sweet child's hair up more often.

Halloween and CPR

Last night the kids and I had a fun time talking about Halloween costumes.

A: Tag, what do you want to be for Halloween?
T: What you already said, big turtleneck shirt with an A on it and a red hat, so I can be a chipmunk.
A: Woot!! That's my boy. [looking around the room for further inspiration, noticing our case of computer paper] Wait, what if we got foamy poster board and made you into a paper airplane?
T: Mmmmm, nope.
A: What about Dad's idea to make you a gumball machine?
T: What?!? Nope.
A: What if we took poster board (here am I, on a poster board kick) and painted it so you look like a wrapped stick of gum? Or square poster board so you look like a chiclet?
T: A what?
A: A chiclet... um, little square gum.
P: [getting into the spirit of things] I could be a butterfly princess! With a crown, and wings, and be all pink.
A: That's true. We could also give you brown pants, green shirt, and put leaves and flowers all over you and call you a tree.
P: Or I could be a pink girl, with pink shirt, and dress, and necklace, and bracelet, and hair tie....
A: Yep, or you could have your flower pants on with an old t shirt, wear your crocs, and you could carry our little shovel and little rake, and a watering can and a weird hat. You'd be a gardener!
P: Yeah! Or I could be a mermaid princess with a tail and long hair!
T: I could be a bouncy ball!
A: [thinking: that'd be called type-casting]
A: [to Man] Black robe and scar? He already has the glasses...
M: No, no, do you know how many kids are going to be Harry Potter this year?
P: If I change my mind, can I change my costume on Halloween?
A: Nope, sorry. You can't change your mind after I start putting these together.
P: Or maybe I could be a bird princess with red and pink feathers and a pink necklace and a crown. Or make yarn hair that goes to my feet with a crown!

Thus we conclude that Tag wants to be Alvin the chipmunk and Princess wants to be anything fantastic and beautiful, as long as it's pink with a crown.

CPR on Saturday was a lot of fun. It was four hours of video and practice on dummies. The crowd had a good sense of humor in general and there was another pregnant lady there so when we had to find the right place on a person for giving abdominal thrusts, we found it on each other since letting a strange person touch our bellies like that was just too weird. For some reason it was alright if we were in the same condition.

The first hands on practice we had with real people was (not only the abdominal trust thing, but also) rolling a person toward us while supporting the neck and back in a straight line. Getting on the floor and doing that with people I didn't know put a whole different spin on this sort of thing for me. I had been dreaming of being a nurse practitioner in an office, me with a chart and pen in my hands while the patient sits on the exam table. But taking this class in the context of preparing to study for nursing really crashed into my head how very intimate of a job that can be. Touching people and thier bodies on a daily necessity is an idea that's totally new to me. I grew up with a lot of personal space and even now I hug one good friend about every other week though I'm very huggy with my kids and husband.

It was a shocking change in perspective for me. It'll be interesting to watch how that intimacy can stay perfectly professional. Even though I've had plenty of medical care with varying degrees of invasion, I've never had to place myself completely in the situation I'm experiencing as a patient. On the other end of things I'm suddenly thinking about all of the doctors who have delivered my babies, or the one who did that little procedure on my abdomen in the ER, and they all have to be completely mentally there in order to perform well in what they're doing. They don't count ceiling tiles or sing children's songs or think of their “happy place” when a scalpel or a newborn is in their hands. The abdominal surgery guy was incredibly nice and I recall the genuine kindness in his voice when he said that I seemed like I was someone who would make a good mother. How does one have such kindness, love of such a job, joy in hard work paying off in each person who is healed, and not get emotionally invested? It sounds fatiguing to be the person people rely on when they are at their worst, the person people blame if things go very wrong, the person who holds life and quality of life in those latex-armored hands.

Suddenly doctor jokes seem hilariously funny to me, and then again, not quite so funny at all.
I spoke with a friend yesterday who is a physical therapist. She recommended that I get some volunteer hours at hospitals throughout my education or even before I start classes to help me transition, and it looks really good on a resume. Just one four hour shift a week can help quite a lot.

I'm still sort of shocked at how real this is all becoming.

And, K, even though I'm sure lawyering has it's emotionally investing aspects, I suddenly understand why you chose law rather than medicine. :)

Remembing lunch

In this post, I talked about trying to get Man to remember to take his lunch. The night before last I put his keys in his lunch sack in the fridge and he STILL had to run back in the house for it. Flabbergasted, I asked for some sort of explanation of how that happened.

He said he went out the door, had to go back in the door to get his lunch, took the keys out and set the bag on the counter, went out the door, then had to come back in to get his lunch. Ha!! It gets cool enough at night that I'm thinking of making it for him and just sticking it in his car. Or maybe sticking it in his ear, that poor man.

TGIF, people!! I have a CPR class all afternoon tomorrow. It sounds like a lot of fun and I get a free cert at the end! Sweet!

I'm out in public and my clothes don't match!!

Has anyone ever seen Jimmy Neutron the movie? All of the parents get abducted by aliens so the kids have a huge celebration of their freedom. They do things that their parents tell them not to, like letting the cold out of the fridge, eat tons of junk food, run up the "down" escalator, and one kid does a dance while chanting "my clothes don't match, my clothes don't match, I'm out in public and my clothes don't match!"

Well, I've grown out of all of my own clothes, the maternity pants my mom made me don't quite fit yet (they fall down) so I wear sweat pants and a pair of capri's from my heaviest weight. This morning I realized that today must be laundry day and had to put on a pair of Man's old PT sweat pants (from basic training, they don't use those anymore here so I see tons of spouses in them) and his old college t-shirt from when he was in marching band.

::sigh:: I'm wearing my skinny husband's clothing. That should make me feel good, right? When we were first married I could wear his jeans. Now he clocks in at 185 of pure muscle and I um, weigh more than that.

Oh, well. At least his clothes are comfortable.

Have you ever been stuck in traffic only to find with annoyance that someone on foot or on a bike is consistently passing you up every time you manage to move a little? Then you wonder what is the point of these stinking cars? There's that guy over there, going faster than I am, polluting the atmosphere a lot less than I am, losing weight like I am not, grinning (with gnats in his teeth) and I bet he drinks protein shakes and eats tons of fresh veggies. And he's going faster than I am. In my car. Grrrr.

Well the parking situation at Princess' school is a nightmare, especially since we got notes in backpacks last week that we're not allowed to park on the sand because a couple of idiots put their little low riders completely in the sand, got stuck, and required towage. That means that about 10 spaces worth of parking is gone which means that every other even vaguely legal place to park is jam packed for the 30 mins before and 30 mins after school. Yet we're required to pick them up and drop them off "promptly" lest they get little pink slips which no parent wants to be responsible for making their kid get especially in kindergarten when we have so much control over whether they're late. (Go ahead, K, you are a hero and deserve to celebrate not having to commute your kids to school. lol)

This morning the line to get into the drop off lane was indecent and moving at a snail's pace. So I parked in the first vaguely legal place I could find (half on the sand, no less), ran her across the parking lot to the drop off area, ran back, and found that traffic hadn't missed me. I felt like that biker who was moving faster than the cars and as I explained that to Princess she sort of looked at me like I was crazy but had a good time going faster than the cars anyway. And I looked like a loser soccer mom in my husband's clothes, no makeup, Crocs on my feet, hair in pony tail, running with a pregnant belly across the parking lot. lol At least I was comfortable, my kid didn't get a pink slip, and I got some exercise, right? Booyah!!

Today's list of thing to do:

-Laundry
-Make Jello jigglers with my very bored son
-Make a scripture case with my very bored son (Man is letting him use his micro-sized military scriptures and Tag said he wanted it to be made from yarn... we'll find the manliest yarn I've got and I'm sooooo happy to be making it for micro-sized)
-Take my very bored son to the park and tell him another 12 times when the little next door neighbor will be coming back from vacation

Skip work, make babies

My apolgies to the squeamish among you, but this was too funny to pass up.

http://www.reuters.com/article/latestCrisis/idUSL12402127

Excerpt:

The governor of a central Russian province urged couples to skip work on
Wednesday and make love instead to help boost Russia's low birth-rate.

And if a woman gives birth in exactly nine months time -- on Russia's
national day on June 12 -- she will qualify for a prize, perhaps even winning a
new home.

Ha! Little do these people know that pregnancy is counted from the first day of your last period, not on the day the little one in conceived. They are likely to have an increase in babies 8-8 3/4 months later, but unless a woman carries her baby two weeks post date she's out of luck.

And a new stove? Come on, for crying out loud.

A throne of a different sort

I was called into his room because he was stuck. When I saw how he got himself stuck, I stood rooted for half a minute struggling not to laugh and told him to stay there until I came back. I ran to get the camera and told Man that if he happened to see Tag in his room to not yell at him. Yes, his chair is hanging off of the window sill. I found tiny shavings of blue plastic on the outside where the legs scraped a bit.

He gets points for creativity and a couple more points for not breaking anything.

::forehead smack::

Well, as nervous as we were over this appt, it was basically "take one of these (cortisone shot) and call me in two weeks."

Riiiiiight. Ok. Now, once again, based on reading alone, a cortisone shot is about the last thing that should be done for tendon degeneration but the dr looked at the MRI from May and assumed that it was an issue of swelling. If his pain isn't doing any better in two weeks, they'll start talking about the scary stuff from the other post.

Talk about anticlimactic.

'Nuff said

Snippets

I hate skunks. Why? Because skunks love my house. I love keeping the windows open a bit at night because I love waking up to a cold house. I'm weird. But yesterday morning I had a stuffy nose so I could occasionally catch bits of skunk-reek which were bad enough to disturb my sleep. I finally woke up enough to investigate and found that we had been "gifted" with some sort of animal kingdom chemical bomb and from triangulation, it was right in our front yard. I guess that's better than the time we got it in our little shed courtyard. Those stinkers live in the storm drains and wilderness around our neighborhood and come to visit on a regular basis. They harass the dogs that are kept out of doors at night and spray when the dogs get too loud, which makes the dogs louder. I'm normally a pacifist but there are just some animals in this world that could die and I wouldn't care too much.

I don't feel pregnant. Weird, I know, especially for going on 24 weeks or 5 months for the non-initiated. I lost the morning sickness completely at 16 weeks and whatever super sense of smell I might normally have has been totally obscured by a series of colds and that really nasty sinus infection. I can still taste, which is important for that occasional chocolate hit, but smells just don't bother me much (exception: see above). Freida still kicks all the time, I still have to dash for the bathroom, and things are feeling a bit heavier. But I'm not exceptionally emotional and I have no weird food cravings. I did buy a large jar of pickles from Costco but anyone who knew me as a kid will recall that this isn't odd. I've always tried pretty hard to not get too attached to the idea of the developing offspring with knowing all that could go wrong but I always felt, well, pregnant. There's no other way to describe it. That just isn't there this time. Maybe I'm just too dang used to being pregnant.

Man goes in for his appt today. If you happen to think of him around 12:00 pacific time, I'd appreciate any good vibes sent his way. He confessed last night that he's really nervous about this. I'm having to fight the circle my thoughts are going in as we wait for this doctor and Man's superiors to determine our fate. And I just hope and pray that we'll have health insurance long enough to get this baby born and to get me some post partum care, and to get Tag's meds, and the baby's newborn care, and then Princess' physical for 1st grade next year and Tag's 5 year old shots, and some freakin' birth control for the love of mercy, and what if we keep getting MRSA episodes? Those can be deadly if left unchecked. Yep, that's the circle my mind keeps going in. What will we do with yet another child to support if we end up right at square one? All of the circumstances that led up to joining the military will still be valid.

I'm going to go make some more zucchini bread. And I'm going to clean my house. And turn on some loud music. And maybe take my kids to that cool park again. And just live. I am not a slave to this. We've been through this before, and maybe we'll go through it again, but I am not a slave to it.

Two monkies

A package from Grandma B came the other day. Pics of girls later:

Dinner banter

Last night we were eating and we made the mistake of allowing Pebbles and Tag to sit next to each other. They were constantly touching, poking, smacking, etc, until Man got fed up and said:

Man: If you don't quit then we'll have to move!

Tag: [shocked wonder on his face] To a different city?

Ok, this kid's 4 and he's moved so much that he thinks we just arbitrarily make a decision like that. Sad, yes?

How could we hope to see His face

Well, my stress levels just jumped a notch. Man has his appt with the orthopedic dude tomorrow but he's been reading up on tendonosis. From what he can tell from reading and the constant pain he's in, it's actually likely that he'll get a med discharge for disability. We'll just have to wait and see. At best, he's likely to get reclassed which means get a different job. At worst, he'll get discharged with disability pay which is 10% of what he currently brings in. These things take a very long time to work out though, so we could just be sitting here for a long time or not long at all depending on the Dx and treatment plan`. I just hope they don't want us to move before this baby is a couple of months old at least.

Reprinted without permission, but this is how I feel right now:

From Cumorah's Hill
The Power of God

Listen to the wind blow lonely as a sigh
Nothing overhead but empty sky
Look up at starlight on a dark night
Are we all alone, an island in space
Or is there a plan where I have a place

Could it be that heaven is Man's imagining
Reaching for hope in childish dreams
Stories so old that we've outgrown them

Has God gone away or hidden His face
Have miracles ceased to be?

But the power of God is plain to see
There are wonders on every hand
To those who will see through eyes of faith
Beyond the mind of Man

For how could we hope to see His face
Who never could see His hand?

Some may see a rainbow as nothing more than light
Others see a promise and a sign
Every day wonders without number
Are here all around and wait to be found
By those who have eyes to see

For the power of God is plain to see
There are wonders on every hand
To those who will see through eyes of faith
Beyond the mind of Man

For how could we hope to see His face
Who never could see His hand?

Listen to the wind blow then listen once again...

Hindsight has shown me that for every wrench in the gears and for every 5 steps back we've learned or gained something incredible that I simply would not trade for an easy life. Not that I'm TRYING to make my life hard.

I was asked this question last week.. "if you could, would you change the past?"

I had to look at my sweet first child, her twinkly blue eyes smiling at me, and I simply couldn't say anything but "no."

The tooth brush song

There are some parts of getting ready for bed that are just not a whole lot of fun for kids. Like, all of the parts. Lately I've been singing songs while Tag gives himself his puffer at night. We were still having to sit on the two younger kids to get their teeth brushed until one night I struggled once more to convince Tag that it feels so good to have clean teeth, etc, and then I started singing The Wheels on the Bus, but then it struck my noggin that a toothbrush song would be more fitting, and I managed to strike gold as far as my kids are concerned:

The brush in Tag's mouth goes swish swish swish... (etc)
All through your mouth

The bubbles in your mouth go (at this point I wag my tongue across my upper lip to make a bubbly noise while still singing the tune)
All through your mouth

The tongue in your mouth goes (I wag my tongue again as above, but omit singing, so it's sort of a whisper bubble noise)
All through your mouth.

The Plaque on your teeth says "I am dying! I am dying! I am dying!" etc (hollered in a distressed, high pitched voice)
All through your mouth.

This song is so funny to them that they want me to keep singing even after their teeth are clean. However, I tell them that this is the special toothbrushing song that I only sing while I brush someone's teeth. At that point they run to the bathroom to fetch Pebbles' toothbrush so they can listen one last time, and all of the laughing, singing, and people watching her face distracts her enough that she doesn't mind brushing so much. She just watches these weird people with that scathingly skeptical look she gets on her pretty face and lets me brush as I please.

Any suggestions for additional verses? I'll try to think of some as well.

The morning dash

I woke up this morning after dreaming about trying to buy some food at a movie theater only to have my name pop up as the name of a wanted felon (who was old, fat, ugly, and MALE) when I stirred my sleepy eyes and saw that it was 7:19. Ack!! I didn't set my alarm for 6:30 last night. Thankfully, Princess had her tomorrow clothes ready to go and her backpack in its place so that when I woke her up she was only 10 mins from sleeping to ready. Fear of the tardy slip made her rush where she normally putters and we were still ready to go out the door a few mins before our 7:45 go time.

She dressed herself in this adorable taupe dress that has china blue flowers on it, getting thicker with floral toward the hem, but it was sleeveless and last night I didn't look too carefully at the shirt she chose to go under it. This morning she had her light blue shirt that has a very slight green cast to it (actually a pretty shirt) under this pretty dress and then she put her pink and yellow rain boots with it. I mentioned that she might want to go with pants today until we find a better shirt to go with her dress, but she wanted to go as was. ::sigh:: I was very torn on whether I should just let her walk out with that outfit, being a good supportive mom who appreciates her child's style creativity or a mom who wisely warns her daughter that she's making several fashion faux pas so she can shape up a bit before heading out. I erred on the side of gently suggesting pants, she stuck with her decision, and I didn't say a word after that. I refused to let the funny looking outfit diminish my pride and appreciation of my daughter. Moms, how do you handle such things? I know the dynamic will change as she grows and I'll have less and less input unless I prove myself the ultimate in chic.

::snort:: Bwahahaha! As if.

Me in 10 years: "Put a jacket over those spaghetti straps!! Layer with those short-shorts, no, ladies do not wear fishnet stockings, and are you sure you're not going to break your neck with those 4" spike healed thigh-high boots?"

Can anyone imagine my sweet Princess in such a getup? Of course not. That's because it'll never happen.

Do a little digging, and you find the nuggets

After looking around at education opportunities, I find that H&R Block offers full scholarships for military spouses.

Link

It's the basic course, but still! I've been interested in these courses for a long time. Now I just need to find about 10 Saturdays where I can get away and take 81 hours of tax classes. lol Think I can do it before Christmas? I hear that they just started a course last week so I might have to wait until spring for this one.

I taught my second class today, Basic Problem Solving again. I'm finding that practice really does help a lot even after just one try. I signed up to teach Acronyms in December which is another really easy class. I only have to teach twice in the next quarter and then I'm taking the following quarter off for maternity leave.

After the last couple of Christmases we've had, I'm thinking of bowing out of Christmas entirely this year, except for my husband and kids. Cards, phone calls, and then packing my hospital bag for the weekend after Christmas and an induction. Any objections from the masses? When I was pregnant with Pebbles, I asked Man to take care of gifting his sister but he never got around to it. That was pretty embarrassing but I was having contractions from stress with even just my side of the family to worry about. The following Christmas we moved here and were a mess. I think I ordered some things online that year but most of it is sort of fuzzy, especially with being in the ER for the three days leading up to and on Christmas itself.

This Christmas.... I'd really just like to take thing very easy. I miss enjoying the holiday, savoring the smells, lights, spirit, family, and preparing a few surprises for loved ones. We like to drive around and look at lights, bringing our song books so we can sing together and then come home to hot chocolate with candy cane stirrers. I have little advent ornaments for the kids to put on our mini tree, which is likely what we'll be putting up again since Pebbles is just the perfect age to be a tree terror. The commissary also has those advent calendars with a tiny chocolate for each day of December that my Grandma B used to send us when I was a kid. There won't be snow but there will be hats, scarves, and deliciously fuzzy socks and warm covers that are so hard to get out of when you've got a freezing cold wood floor to whisk all thoughts of sleep from your head as soon as your toes come in contact with it.

One day at a time.

25 years in one day

My Aunt R called me today to see if I wanted anything out of her garage. LOL! So far I have claim over a food dehydrator and a vacuum sealer. Woohoo!! Add that to the rice cooker and I've scored over $200 worth of small appliances. Apparently I get to go through her house any time I want before she has a yard sale. I'm going to take her some clothes pins and a thank you card. Nice trade? She's been garage saleing and flea marketing for 25 years or so, and now I get to reap the bounty in just one day. Of course I'll only bring home what I need, us having a household weight limit and all, but I have been wanting a vacuum sealer ever since moving out of Man's mother's house.

In other news, I just got a call from the dr's office to let me know that my blood test came back negative for 5th disease virus, so Freida is in the clear as far as fetal anemia and potential heart failure. Woohoo!

We ran some errands this morning after I sat and had a good hard think about how to organize my linen closet. I'm so sick of not having a clear plan with my house that I thought I'd tackle the worst beast we have, as far as chaos, wasted space, and boxes full of things we havn't even looked at in the 9 months we've been here. My linen closet is huge. It has twice the width of the door in shelf space which means, of course, that half of it is completely inaccessible which, of course, means that it holds over a dozen boxes of useless junk. I've made one small triumph. I got clear boxes and they now hold categories of items (nail things, first aid, eye supplies, and tooth/mouth supplies), and to the hair stuff basket I added two of those little containers that hold portions of infant formula in three chambers. The lid spins to allow access to one compartment at a time with a small pop-off lid for pouring, and the whole top also pops off for cleaning or, in my case, sorting. Each compartment holds a different kind and size of hair tie and the two of them nestle in nicely among the brushes and combs.

One day, one triumph at a time.

I need a nap.

Back to basics

I love it when people can teach me HOW to cook rather than just wave a recipe under my nose.

Recipezaar is doing a back to basics series in September, featuring several techniques, hints, and secrets both ancient and modern that make great chefs out of dorm junkies.

My favorite so far is the Challah Braiding class.

Here is the extensive class list. Gosh, I love this website!!

"So, there aren't any bad guys?"

This morning I heard a lot of emergency vehicle sirens and, on the way home from dropping Princess off at school, saw police officers handing out fliers to motorists. After a call to the PD it turns out that it's just information on how to stay safe now that traffic around schools is so much greater. "So, there aren't any bad guys?" "Absolutely not, Ma'am, not to worry."

lol It's a good thing to not spaz, isn't it?

I made a phone call this morning because I promised in a previous post I would, and it turns out there's a college here where I can get generals taken care of for only $20 per credit hour. How could I pass that up? There are also some grants I can work with due to my income bracket and family size.

It looks like I have fewer and fewer excuses to put this thing off. I'm aiming for next fall, after Freida gets fairly settled with life and Tag is also in school.

First tomatoes

For my first small gathering of (finally!!) ripened tomatoes, of course I had to make BLT's. Man had BL's, Pebbles had B and bread (she picked off the other stuff), Princess made herself a B and turkey sandwich, and Tag just ate B until he realized that with a family of five, we get three pieces each and that isn't very filling. So, you can guess which ingredient is the most popular around here. I had the pleasure of layering an entire medium tomato onto my sandwich. The breed of tomato that is ripening more quickly isn't a terribly juicy sort so it was nice to enjoy the full tang of garden tomato without having to wash my arms to the elbow afterward. I'll enjoy the juicier ones later, simply sliced with a sprinkle of salt and a few grinds of pepper. Bliss. :)

Sunday's funny kid moment: The Primary President asked the kids if they knew what sorts of service they could provide for their parents in the evening. One kid in my class raised his hand and said that if it's been a long day for mom to drink cold medicine so you go to sleep faster. Ha! Future insomniac, right there.

Labor Day weekend... Man had to work a normal work day on Saturday, but other than that we've just been kicking it in the afternoons after errands have been run and general cleaning accomplished. We got to visit my grandmother yesterday and, since she's thinking of moving out of the country soon, is massively downsizing her possessions, as is my aunt who was home for a few weeks. So they loaded down our van with things they never wanted to see again, including a large box of books, three bags of children's clothing, and a brand-spankin'-new rice cooker. Sweet!! I've used my rice cooker about 3 times a week for the last 5 years and it's finally starting to look a little worn. And Princess has a new crop of clothes to fit into! Blessings come in the most interesting, unexpected ways sometimes. I had just been lamenting to Man my lack of decent reading material as of late. The 4th Mitford book was in the pile and I devoured it today, once again gettng swept away in these amazing volumes.

They said that we should come back with a moving truck to claim an entire apartment's worth of furniture and, knowing my aunt and her love of flea markets, perhaps a third of the contents of their two car garage which has been lovingly stacked to the gills over the years. I'm sort of glad we had the extra chair in the van for this visit, seeing as I was mentally unprepared to be thus laden. I went through everything as soon as we got home and found homes for everything, whether in my house or someone else's.

College progress: None so far. I have contacted Captain to see if I could help set up an FRG with education as a topic to help motivate me to greater depths of research but havn't heard back yet. I was excited to be reminded that the AFTB classes I took can count toward college credit. Woohoo! I'll contact the education office this week to see about getting an appointment to chat with an advisor.

Oh my stars and little fishes... Heaven help me on this journey.

A new leaf

I have a large desk calendar on my desk. I love this thing. I have a couple of important numbers on it that I just don't ever remember, appointments, and it's right next to the phone and it's large enough that it just doesn't travel anywhere.

Unfortunately, Pebbles loves to climb into the computer chair and draw all over my calendar, Princess has been practicing her new writing skillz on it, and I think some greasy food got on there at one point or another as well. Ew.

I love it when a new month comes, I write those two numbers on a fresh page, and so far I only have 5 appointments on there for the entire month. For your viewing pleasure, an example of last month's page:

And a new month.

Of course, names and phone numbers have been obscured to protect my innocent friends and doctors. My apologies for poor lighting.

It must be in the water

He just keeps tasting things that suddenly don't bother him any more!

Man and I have had a couple of chances to have artichokes since moving here. Neither of us is really crazy about them even though they're pretty ok. We've just always considered it more work than anything.

So the other day the commissary had a pretty good deal on artichokes -- 4/$2. I couldn't pass that up. But what to do with them?

I cut two of them in half (I figured that these were yummy adult food and the kids didn't need their own) and nuked them, cut side down, in a glass 8x8" pan with a half inch of water. I think that next time I'm just going to steam them whole and cut afterward since nuking made the outer leaves somewhat dry.

Anyway, I took the choke out, or rather it sort of fell out when I grabbed the inner leaves and pulled. Then I smeared garlic butter all over the insides of each of them, slapped them on a med-low grill and served them up with aeoli. I would drastically change the aeoli next time since sesame oil ought to be a complement as opposed to a base, and I don't know that Worcestershire sauce goes with it at all. Or maybe we'll just try lemon butter.

We were having an extremely informal dinner of frozen pizza and these artichokes while Man spent some time with a game and the kids sort of grazed. I took a plate over to him and he idly tried a leaf before getting on with the game, but then (ok, get this folks) he paused his game and didn't pick it up again until he was done with his two halves. He said that it was the best artichoke he's ever had in his life. I had to agree with him. That was the sort of reaction he had to our first taste of brined turkey, ciabatta, and his first batch of herbed beef stew after basic training. After a few months of ox tail soup, anything tastes like a dream.

So here's the recipe I used:

Recipe Link.

I wonder what this would taste like with some good balsamic vinegar, or even a light hummus.

Sorry, no pictures because I didn't expect them to be such a hit and they were gone before I could even think of it. Princess got to taste one leaf before I finished mine and had that look kids get when it tasted good and they wished they had jumped on the boat before it was gone.