Resume.

Items that ought to go on the resume but wouldn't look professional: I can cook, help with homework, defrost a freezer, and arbitrate World War III in my kitchen all at the same time. I can sit with a stony face when everyone in the room doesn't like my work and make them say "thank you." I can do a load of laundry, prepare a tax return, fix or make a piece of jewelry, design and prepare two dozen cupcakes or announcements, and even occasionally shower and shave, all before school. I can discern in an instant whether the sad face in front of me is ill from nerves, germs, or laziness. I can find a system of success for my son who has ADHD wherein he now happily undertakes tasks which, a year ago, sent him into instant melt down. I can make, with a square foot of fabric and some thread, a couple of dolls that will keep a 5 year old and a 3 year old happily occupied for hours. I can clean every bodily fluid from nearly every kind of surface without adding to the mess myself. I'm a problem solver for issues both great and small, day and night, messy and classy, both what goes on the body or into it, for feelings and reactions and appointments and hurts seen and unseen. I treasure awkward story telling when it means that my child or partner is excited to share something with me, and intolerant of awkward story telling when in involves such heinous crimes as lamp breaking or cookie stealing. I can do all of this and still relax at a moment's notice during the day, I can be all of this and still have a centered identity, I can get the job done when heroes and leaders of men turn their faces. And my future employer will only know of these things after I've been on the job for a few months because it is unprofessional to show what being a mommy or a wife has taught me.