pics

Once there was a cute little girl named Frieda. She had a happy existence, eating, sleeping, playing with her hands and keeping her giant servant, the Mother, busy. In fact, she had many servants smaller than the Mother who would jump to meet her every whim and fancy. Life was good. Her title as Biggest Baby in all the House was secure for no one would risk displeasing her and be the subject of the Cry of Air Raid Warning.

One day, the smallest (and, let's face it, the least obedient) servant dared to tell her how to give a highfive. Frieda felt that she knew perfectly well how to give a highfive and refused to acknowledge Servant Pebbles' insistent instructions.

A fight ensued...



Until Pebbles was found out by the largest servant.
She tried to claim innocence...

But took it hard when her story was not to be believed.

After some interrogation, it was discovered that the nefarious Pirate Tag was behind the whole scheme. It was his idea to get Pebbles to teach Frieda how to highfive, knowing Frieda's disdain for paying any attention to such activities. His aim was to embarrass Pebbles so badly that she would attempt to overthrow Frieda and usurp her place as the Biggest Baby in all the House. She would reign as a puppet Baby so that Tag could act out as much as he desired but would always be able to frame Pebbles for his dastardly deeds.


You see, he had once attempted to woo Frieda herself, but was shunned. This scheme was his revenge.

Fortunately, the Chief of House Police tattled on Pebbles...

... invoking the wrath of the Mother against one and all for schemes, fights, and tattling. After all booboos had been kissed, all toes tickled, time-outs served, and peace generally restored, Frieda happily resumed her rightful place as Biggest Baby.


Over time, my dear ones, the contest for title of Biggest Baby will ebb and flow. Frieda's clear right to that position will fade in due course to be picked up and borne with bellowing and chest thumping by Man, each servant as they reach the Mysterious Puberty, and yea, even that Mother before whom all tremble when the hideous Aunt Flo disease seizes her mind.

Peace, for now, lulls our hearts into complacency.