Amazon

(Yes, mom, you aren't going crazy, we already had this conversation)

Dear Mom and Dad,

Please be advised that I have sent a box to you from Amazon to supplement what you've already received.

As you know, Amazon has a benefit called Free Super Saver Shipping. If you spend $25 on qualifying items, you will get free shipping on your order, no matter how many boxes it requires to send it. I figured the cost of the things I'm sending and the total was $24.76.

A Google search revealed a list of items on Amazon which qualify for Free Super Saver Shipping with prices ranging from $0.25 to $5.

Be further advised that, in addition to the items intended as Christmas gifts, you will also receive a box of Jumbo Plastic Coated Paper Clips. I don't care what you do with the d*** paper clips.

The order will come in two shipments, as the items become available. Everything will arrive before Christmas except the paper clips, which will come in January some time. I hope you have a Merry Holiday, despite the tardiness of the d*** paper clips.

Be finally advised that you may receive more office supplies or bits of hardware on other gift giving occasions, should they be needed to fluff my cart in the future as well.

Love always,

Annie