Salt

Last night I made homemade pizza but, for the first time in quite a while, forgot to put the salt in the dough. What can I say? I had four little people stepping on my feet, asking when dinner would be ready.

Man approached me later, after eating, and asked if I was trying to get us to eat less salt as a family. I turned from him, determined to not give such a question the time of day.

I wasn't quite sure what bothered me about it, but I returned to him later to voice my conclusion:

I'd rather be thought of as incompetent than conniving.

After all, why would I leave the salt out of the dough then put Prego spaghetti sauce, cheese, and pepperoni on it? That's like those weirdos who get a Supersize McDonald's coronary in a bag along with a 32 ounce diet Coke.

Maybe some day when I goof on dinner, he won't think I have some sort of secret agenda to make him healthier. I can only imagine what he thinks actually happens in the kitchen.

There I stand, over my cauldron, in a black apron and my book of herbal witchcraft, cackling gleefully as I put BRAN into his muffins and BEAN SPROUTS in his green salads and OLIVE OIL instead of butter in my sautee pan and SPINACH in our lasagna, among other dastardly unmentionables in a secret plan to make him healthier, MWAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!! Soon, he'll have more energy with which to complain that my cooking doesn't taste like it used to, he'll have stronger bones with which to beat his chest in the agony of healthy meals, and his mind will be sharp enough to argue concinvingly in favor of transfat, refined sugar, and bleached flour.


NO, I did NOT leave the salt out on purpose.

-sigh-

Check out this awesome website though, where this lady teaches people to use shelf-stable ingredients to make some really great recipes.